Loss

A bowl of noodle is being served in front of you. There’s radish in it, which you never liked. So, almost automatically, you move those radish into your significant other’s bowl. She didn’t mind as she’s used to it for the last ten years. 

You just finished a meeting at the mall and are heading back home now. You enter the elevator and the guy inside asks you, “which floor, sir?”, to which you give no answer, because you can’t seem to remember on which floor you parked your car. You try and try to remember.. but nothing comes up. It was always her thing to know and remember which floor and which elevator to go through. But she’s not here. Not anymore.

Friends come to keep you company while you’re hitting one of your lowest point. You want to make them some coffee. You’re trying to find the coffee filters, one cabinet after the other. Again.. this was her thing. She’s the one who woke up early in the mornings and made coffee. But she’s not here now.

Now.. the hardest part. After months of sleeping on the couch, you try to enter your bedroom again. One step in, one look around inside.. And there it is. The memory of the two of you, just as if these months didn’t pass by and you’re still together. Just as if you’re still waking up next to her smile and falling asleep to her voice because she used to sing before going to bed. Just as if she’s still there, only meters away, in the bathroom, about to enter the bedroom and kiss you good morning. But those as ifs stay as ifs and the room stay empty.